Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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