I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Randomize
