Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Randomize
