So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
My vagina just recognized that song.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
Randomize