you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
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