TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize