so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Randomize