Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
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