Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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