i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
