Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
Randomize
