i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
Randomize
