Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
Randomize
