ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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