Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
Discovered that a nalgene holds an entire bottle of wine. Going mobile. Come find me.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
Randomize
