The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Randomize
