dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Randomize