real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
Randomize
