Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
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