he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
Mom found my vibrator. all the said was 'wow, I've never seen one like this before.'
we don't live in the stone age anymore, mom
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
