I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
YAS. BRING CRAB.
Randomize
