question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
I feel like the only phrases I can clearly speak while drunk consist of: i'm fucking drunk, chug, and shots
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
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