yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
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