On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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