Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
Randomize
