so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
Randomize
