Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
