i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
Randomize
