If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
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