We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
How does it feel to date your dad?
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
