okay pat passed out under dana's car
think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
Why is it that every time I type the word "give" my phone spells out HIV?! You know how many people i've told I want to HIV them something!
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Randomize
