I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
We need to rekindle our bromance
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
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