so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
Randomize
