Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
You got the eggs out of the fridge and yelled "my chickens are beasts at making eggs" and then pegged them at the ceiling and at a couple who were making out
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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