yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
His nipple licking is glorious
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