So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
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