its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
Randomize
