Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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