p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
