this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Randomize
