I just saw a hot homeless man
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
false alarm, still single
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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