Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
