we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
How does it feel to date your dad?
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