Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
