Sponge bath it is.
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
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