Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize
