cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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