Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
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