HIV tests are more positive than that guy
yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
Randomize
