Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
Randomize
